How to Bring Up the Couples Match in an Interview

Written by Clarissa E. Jordan, MD

Having gone through the process two years ago, I’m really passionate about helping other couples in the match & wanted to share what I learned, in the hopes that it might be useful. First a couple of disclaimers: these are my personal opinions and experiences regarding the couples match and may not be representative of all couples, nor do they reflect the opinions of my employer. Additionally, I may use heteronormative language in my examples because I’m talking about my own experiences, but wholeheartedly support all couples in the match regardless of sexual orientation & gender identity.

Congratulations on committing to your medicine and your other half, and on your interview offer(s)! This part of the interview season is a stressful but exciting time. I hope that sharing my experiences will be useful to you and your partner as you navigate this season — even if it’s just to know that other couples can make it, and you can too!

For those participating in the couples match, I’m all for advocating for your partner (and yourself!) during your interviews. Although programs have certainly read your application and noticed that you checked the box for “NMRP Couple,” bringing up your couples match status during the interview will help remind them of this special consideration.

I’ve received several questions from applicants this year about how exactly to bring up their couples match status during an interview. In my experience, it often came up naturally as part of the conversation, but if not, there were three main places in the interview when I mentioned it:

“Tell me about yourself”

While it's of course important to focus on yourself and your strengths in this portion of an interview, the "tell me about yourself" question can be a great time to bring up the couples match. After telling the interviewer my story, I'd say something like "As you may have seen on my application, I'm participating in the couples match with my husband..." Again, you want a balance to this. You don't want to focus on the couples match so much that you don't get to tell the interviewer about yourself. That's why I think it goes best at the end of your answer, after you’ve been able to discuss everything you’ve wanted to from your application.

“Why are you interested in our program specifically?”

Again, in your answers to interview questions, you want to focus on your answers and make sure to respond fully. That being said, this question can be a wonderful opportunity to bring up your partner, and especially their impressions of the partner program. For example, I may finish my answer by saying something like “… so I’m particularly drawn to your strong molecular genetic pathology program and opportunities available to your residents. And as you may know, I’m couples matching with my husband. He’s applying for emergency medicine, and is very interested in University Hospital’s robust ultrasound education program…” This of course requires some extra research ahead of time and communication with your partner, but will show the program that you’re both serious, engaged, and invested in the interview process.

“Tell me something else that wasn’t on your application”

I was often asked this question, and if the couples match status hasn’t come up naturally at this point, this is where you can put in a last-ditch effort. As I mentioned above, I do think it’s important to mention that you’re couples matching during each interview — if programs are aware (and know you are invested in your match as well as your partner’s), they are more likely to communicate with your partner’s program behind the scenes.

In summary, I’d suggest bringing up the fact that you’re couples matching in each interview, if it doesn’t come up naturally during your conversations. This doesn’t have to be very involved (after all, this interview is about you!), but at least mentioning it shows programs you’re invested in the process, and makes it more likely that they will communicate with the partner program.

As always, best of luck to you both in the match!